Cowboy Bob Sorensen

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen  People who have been following this weblog know that I have been widowed, share things I have learned, and written about my lifelong struggle with depression — somewhere. So I am just a guy who has experienced, learned, and shared some things. Depression is a bunkmate with grief, and the shock of loss can accompany it. (I remember the funeral director telling me to remember to eat.) There are some small steps that can help make a difference with depression and self-esteem. Melancholy , Edvard Munch, 1982 Just a brief note about depression itself. Some people get "the blues" now and then, caused by various factors such as stress, not having eaten properly for a while, bad experiences, lack of sleep, and other things. Clinical depression also exists which is most likely caused by internal chemistry. These things can be discussed with your doctor, therapist, pastor, or trusted friends. I hesitate to use self-esteem  because that is often an excuse to get ...

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen  When I first heard about a comfort zone , I thought it meant being comfortable. Later I learned that even discomfort can be part of a comfort zone — which seems almost counterintuitive. A comfort zone is what one is familiar with for safety. Routines can be important in difficult times , such as after my wife Charlene suddenly died. Not only was I in shock from that, but also recovering from open-heart surgery. I need consistency in my life. Routines made things possible, such as going to work in the morning.  Looking down on Rosendale Trestle from Joppenbergh Mountain, Unsplash / Cowboy Bob Sorensen The workday routine involved setting out the next day's clothes, having lunch made and in the 'fridge, a container with medications and supplements, breakfast dishes set out, and all that good stuff. Very helpful during my bad time, but also when running on autopilot from being very tired. There are others, such as what television show I am going to watch (...

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen  This is another article about my growth process as a widower, written in hopes that it will help others. It is not as direct about the grief process as others. Note that at the onset, I learned that everyone grieves in different ways, and that it is okay to do so in the first place. Similarly, we all have to grow and develop. Memories of and tributes to those we lost are good but we cannot stay in the past. Softball diamond from home plate, Unsplash / Cowboy Bob Sorensen People need to learn the value of remaining silent at appropriate times. (See " Peace, be Still! ") Strategic silence. The importance of this may dawn in people's minds in their forties, but even more so in their sixties. Blessed are those who learn it sooner. Consider when we establish our boundaries. When pushed on something, a simple, "That will not work for me," should be sufficient. Unfortunately, we tend to provide a litany of reasons why not. Those are actually inv...

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen Although this fits with my frequent dealing with bereavement theme, it also deals with psychological and even spiritual freedoms. Keep reading. You will thank me later. Some people equate clutter with filth, which is not necessarily the case. (Clutter with organic material that should have been thrown away, yes, that is filth and attracts crunchy bugs.) Some folks want their homes like museums where nothing is out of place. Many others accept a few things that are not put away. Then there is the out-of-sight clutter. Clutter, Pexels / Bingqian Li (enhanced) Aside from things we set down and walk away from, why do we have clutter? Carelessness for one. Also, being distracted; the phone rings while carrying something through the front door. Those are the immediate things and they can be put where they belong later. But there are sheds, basements, hobby rooms, and other places that are full of things that aren't exactly useful. It gets difficult to declutter. O...

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen  Before I get into the more thoughtful ponderings, here is something a mite humorous. I "inherited" from Charlene a George Foreman "Beyond" 7-in-1 grill. I do not think she used most of the functions aside from the air fryer. Me, neither, at first. It took 2-1/2 years for me to realize something. A supermarket sells fish portions in containers that can go in the oven. The grill has a bake function and has, plenty of room for the container. So, I baked it. Pizza in George Foreman Beyond, 7-in-1 Grill The next day, I tried a single-serving pizza (in which I lived up to the "abuser of food" part of my X profile ) and added some canned sauerkraut halfway through baking. Both items turned out fine. This means I don't have to turn on the big oven in warm weather for small stuff. In fact, I can put an oven-safe plate in there to heat things. I'm going to experiment. Mayhaps I'll try the "roast" setting... A spell back,...

by Cowboy Bob Sorensen  December 2 was the first snow accumulation for our area of New York state, with a range of accumulations. Some were a couple of inches, higher elevations got more. We had about five inches. When I went to work at seven in the A of M...nothing. I scoffed, as they were wrong many times before. When I came out at two PM, it was a challenge to get to the car in the parking lot. I flailed and landed on the snow-packed pavement on my right side. 6 AM December 3, less swelling but more color, photo by Cowboy Bob Sorensen It was tricky getting home, but I finally parked, walked to the entrance and climbed the nine stairs to my apartment. When I realized a few minutes later (getting out of wet clothes was a priority) that I had pain and swelling below the kneecap (it felt like burning), I sought help. No way was I going to try to get to urgent care in this weather, so I used a video service where I could talk to medical professionals on the cell phone. The nurse prac...